They say the seven year itch is when couples realize that they have lost their spark, settled for the monotony of their married lives and stopped clicking.But nowadays couples are experiencing this disconnect much sooner.
The demands of modern day life with stressful jobs,growing mound of domestic chores, child care responsibilities and the flurry of seemingly important activities all take their toll on our marriages. Lack of fun, intimacy and sex onlyadd up to dimming your romance and interfere with your marital well-being.
Though this phenomenon sounds like an old wives tale, we bring you seven simple tips to scratch that itch and rekindle the flame with your spouse.
1. Choose quality over quantity.
The irony of modern life is such that we spend a lot of time in traffic, with our colleagues, or on the phone but the least with our spouses. Bedtime talks, breakfast conversations, post dinner walks or a quick 5 minute phone call in the middle of the day is enough to catch up with each other’s lives. Give your spouse the undivided attention that they deserve and read the state of their mind.
Every marriage has its own big milestones but it is these small intimate conversations that keep it going.
2. Surprise your partner
Predictability though can offer a lot of stability to marriage; sometimes little surprises can bring immense joy and delight to your loved one. Amaze your spouse with a small gift or a quick lunch or a bunch of roses. Little unexpected gestures can take you back to the good old days and that feeling of still being the-special-one in your spouse’s eyesis priceless.
3. Novelty is the spice of life
Spice up your life by signing up for a salsa class or going for a trekking adventure or taking a vacation without your kids. Pursuing a new interest or doing new activities together will ensure that take a break from your regular life, spend time with each other and remindyou the reasons as to why you fell in love with your spouse.
4. Plan a date night
When there is nothing left to be known about your spouse, behave like strangers for a day and plan a date night. Dress up in your finest attire; look your best, leave your gadgets behind and plan on impressing your date. The change of atmosphere, zero work talksand the freshness of the experience will add the much desired special effects to get to know your partner in a new light and celebrate your love for one another.
5. Temper your expectations
Marriages can make us completely reliant on our partners leading to a lot of unrealistic expectations. Hoping to get a great spouse, parent, partner, friend, advisor, coach, housekeeper, all-in-one person is a recipe for disaster. We all will be well-advised to look at our spouses as normal beings who will fail to deliver at times. Be affectionate, kind and understanding during these moments and let there be no loss of love due to exaggerated expectations.
6. Stay fit
The weight gain theory post marriage is quite notorious. New priorities, emotional changes, hormonal imbalances, family planning, child-rearing, adult care and other demanding duties of marriage, can make us complacent and throw our workout plans out of gear. Take care of your physical, mental and emotional well-being coz it’s essential for thesurvival of any relationship.
Positivity, confidence and physical desirability still top the charts for many to be attracted to their partners. Spice up these areas of your life and see how you entice your spouse like a moth to a flame.
7. Forgive and forget
Slip-ups are a common feature of marriage. While sharing lives, spaces and responsibilities, there are bound to be different points of views, heated arguments and disappointments. Don’t let them fester inside of you. Whether it is a work situation, in-laws issues, child care or personal habits, talk it out with your partner. Let go of things which aren’t important in your relationship, make up quickly and lose unwanted baggage.
There is no denying that every marriage is fraught with its ups and downs.The eventual success of a marriage lies in our willingness to grow as individuals, our commitment to our relationship and the faith we place in our partner’s ability to stick around, through the good, the bad and the ugly.